Marriage & Money

In a marriage, a healthy financial equation is one of the necessities for a strong foundation. We have witnessed innumerable cases where finances are one of the major reasons why married couples fight. After a certain age, it is not just about the money we earn. There are several positive emotions like pride, independence, power and an equal amount of negative emotions like ego, dependence, and insecurity attached to the money that comes into the house. The financial aspect of a marriage is a very personal and private decision for every couple, but we have some guidelines that you could follow to ensure that there is no tension or friction caused in the future due to this aspect.

1. Have a clear picture in the courtship period itself-

   One major mistake that a couple makes during the courtship period is not discussing the financial future. It takes marriage to know how much you actually need to run the house and run your show monetarily.  If things are not clear and planned beforehand, then certain events may unfold to just come as a shocking surprise post marriage.

2. Ensure that the financial equation does not make one of the two feel superior or inferior. Talk about it! –

   If only one partner takes care of the entire financial gamut from earning to spending, saving and investing, there is then a tendency to dictate terms and conditions to the non-earning spouse. In some cases, the other half needs to grovel for money every month and take care of household or personal expenses in a challenging way. It must be a well-informed decision on how the equation is set so that none of the two feel inferior or insecure in the long run.

3. Depending on how strong you feel about the marriage, make financial management a joint project-

   If both the partners are earning, then sharing the financial responsibilities, investing together and having a joint financial scenario does strengthen the bond. At the same time, if there are differences with respect to other aspects in the marriage this can also sabotage the intention. In a fit of anger or revengefulness, it is very easy to malign the joint ventures which were initially set together with a good intention.

4. You have Right to information –

   Whether you are the earning or non-earning partner in the marriage, you have the right to information on the joint financial scenario at home. Ensure that clarity and information is shared periodically. This is a very important factor in order to know how big the blanket is. Also, be prepared for the worst, in case if one were to pass away the other should not be left clueless. Budgeting and having common financial goals are important for the smooth functioning of any household.

5. Seek help –

   In case of confusion or distress, it is always advisable to seek financial help from experts, accountants and strong common mediators between the two. An advisor or a mediator can help the couple take objective and pragmatics stances on the need to share financial details with each other.

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